SOCIAL GRACES FOR ALL - By Elesean Gordon-Fuller Email: eleseang@yahoo.com

Social graces are manners which are used when socializing with individuals. Some persons have failed miserably because they do not know better while others who are expected to know better have ignored these acceptable rules. It is important to become familiar with social graces so as to prevent embarrassment in settings such as a job interview, a formal event with your boss or in everyday scenarios.

Isn’t it true that you would assume that your boss, an interviewer or a host would practice these skills? I assumed this too until a few years ago when I was interviewed by the CEO and principal shareholder of a popular media house who boasts over 25 years of local and overseas experience.

My research revealed this was a professional and upstanding individual who did not settle for mediocrity. The more information I uncovered the more nerve-racking the thought of being interviewed by one of media’s greatest became.

On entering the interview I could sense a level of discomfort in the interviewer. Strange, I thought. This was soon revealed when he started to rub his chest in a way that my grandmother would when she had gas in her stomach. The interview was soon interrupted by loud belches from the interviewer who offered no apology. I was in shock! How could someone in such a prestigious position behave in such a manner showing scant regard for my presence? And then, the unthinkable… my sense of smell was awakened by an obnoxious odor that could be likened to flatulence. This was unbelievable! If he wanted to see how well I handled pressure this was a true test.   

The interview proceeded with questions which showed that he was not prepared for the interview and had not gone over my résumé until now as he asked questions, the answers to which were clearly stated on my application such as my address and name. I felt embarrassed for him. Would you have thought that you would be asked to declare your political preference unless you were applying for one of those relevant positions? No, I was not being interviewed for a position with the Electoral Office of Jamaica or any other government entity. This was a position for a media practitioner intern. But, of course he would want an unbiased intern so I’ll let that one pass.

My politically correct response: “I don’t think I have been around long enough to develop a liking for either of the two major political parties”.

After instructing me to do some voiceovers and return to his office on my return, the interviewer was exiting his chair and making for the door as if to indicate our interview had concluded. Maybe he wanted a bathroom break but he could have asked for excuse. By now I was sure I had no interest in being an intern at this place. I politely said I’m sorry Mr… but I do have some questions of my own if you don’t mind. He obliged.

Me: “Can you tell me more about the structure of this internship programme?”

Interviewer: “Well, you just come to work and uh do a number of things”

His response did not convince me that this ‘programme’ would facilitate my development as a young aspiring media practitioner.

Social graces are for all. There is no excuse or substitute for good manners. What is good for the goose is good for the gander. Let us all be respectful of our associates, boss, subordinates or family members. Practice social graces it will save you the embarrassment.